I know what he means. I just lost a wallet, & I just lost a boy. You know, the exact same thing.
One day, you realize its gone. You try to look for it everywhere, even going back to the places where you could have lost it.
You think, & you think hard, only to come upon a grim realization: it’s really gone.
Ofcourse, you can hold on to some hope. After all, there have been some very, very (blessed?) people who get it back.
Perhaps you could become one of those people. You sit home & you hope that someone would call, & that you would get it back. But then, some time passes, & you realize that its still gone, & you realize that its time to let go.
The 1st few days, you turn to your friends for support. Some tell you you’ll be okay, some tell you that it was your fault & that you should have been more careful, & some tell you about their own experiences.
They give you all sorts of advices, none you haven’t heard before. You then go out to find a new wallet, only to realize that you don’t really want a new one. You want the old one that you lost.
No, you don’t want all these better-looking wallets, you want yours, because of how comfortable it is, because of all the cards & pictures & other stuff in it.
You go out & carry on without a wallet, keeping your money in your pocket instead. You throw away stuffs that you would have held on if you had your old wallet. And then, finally, you find a new wallet you like & settle in. you then start filling your new wallet, little by little. It still doesn’t feel as comfortable as the old one. But its getting there.
Then you start putting in cards & pictures & other important stuff in the wallet. Soon enough, there’s as much stuff in your new wallet as the old one. And then, after sometime, you feel comfortable with your new wallet.
And then you realize that you’ve almost forgotten you ever had your old wallet. Sure, you still remember most of the stuff you lost on that wallet. But then again, you don’t remember the feeling of hurt that you felt when you lost it.
That’s because that wallet you lost is no longer your wallet. You’re no longer holding on. This new wallet you’re holding, it has all the important cards & pictures & stuff that you need. This is your wallet.
And this time, you tell yourself, you’re never losing this one.
** The thing is I don’t use wallets… So I’m wondering if I will ever find a “wallet” I like enough…